Sunday, October 01, 2006

Roger, Puh-Leeezzzeeee

I've mentioned occasionally that I've ceased being very interested in sports, despite growing up in OK and despite once being able to tell you every World Series winner back into the 40s. A number of reasons, mainly the corruption of the participants (owners as well as players) and the addiction of the spectators (media as well as fans) that have substantially assisted Oprah in the corrosion of our Republic. So, the latest "shocker" to dominate the sports news, that some well-known players have been outed as substance abusers to give them an unfair, unequal advantage in baseball, just makes me shake my head. Not at the players, but that this would even be news.

Hello, "shocked" and "can't be true"? Did you not see Roger Clemons flame out on the mound at an umpire in that playoff game with the Red Sox? Did you not put 2 and 2 together when he threw the end of a broken baseball bat at Piazza in the World Series? In the Picture Dictionary, next to "roid rage" is his face. News flash! Athletes in their 40s do not do better than they did in their late 20s/early 30s. Some (the Spahns, the Ryans, the Carltons) hold it together at a premium level as they did in younger years for 2 or 3 more years, but they didn't put up better numbers. That's what's made all this "benefit of the doubt" and "innocent until proven guilty" so laughable about Bonds. OF COURSE THEY TOOK PERFORMANCE ENHANCERS. News flash!! Most baseball players do. It's just the ones they took will leave them on tubes and respirators before the other guys who just settled for greenies.

Segui has admitted it. Tejada has been outed before. Jay Gibbons. Double puh-leezzeee. I lived in MD when he came up. He was a walking steroid from the start. My immediate thought when I first saw him was "Geez, I wonder if he has any balls left." But that's my own personal problem. These guys will deny, then say they didn't know, then go dark, like Mark McGwire. And the owners and managers and coaches, why, we had no idea, excuse me while I go to the bank. Wait, wait, it's the fans' fault because they want homeruns. As Jeff Goldblum said in "The Big Chill," we can go without sex for days (some of us longer) but can we go even a day without a rationalization?

Actually, there is enough blame to go around, but no excuses. Sports are corrupt because we as a nation have given up on standards, on fair play, on class. A nation that could allow Bushnev and comrades into the White House is rotten at its core. The blooms off it, whether sports or other business, whether education, media, or just day-to-day relations, whether Vietnam, Iraq, or Iran, will be covered in it. Clemons? He's just one more asterisk in a record book that increasingly means nothing.

Sorry, Maddux.